....then there was light

Well.....4 years ain't enough to know someone.....even if that's your mentor(s)! I am working on my dissertation, and well.....the 1st and maybe (too hard) thing that he had told me on the 1st day was that " there'll be very little hand-holding from my side. You'll have to be self-sufficient...'coz I have too many things laid out on my table to be taken care of through the next couple of years". I was scared, but I'm happy that I didn't let go. Whatever little hand he extended or didn't extend I grabbed on and tried to stay afloat all this while. Some times I felt, why shouldn't I get a little more care .... like my mates in LAN....how they're so pampered and how they manage to party so much, play addictive games on the net (actually I envied how they could get into another addiction), and have fun! May be they were a tad smarter than me! But I so wanted to break free sometimes!

But I was so wrong.....I am so glad I was :)
I toiled hard.....they made me! When they just let me a tip of their finger, they did it on purpose, so that I could grow up one day, and manage the steering wheel myself. Once in a while they'd give the wheel a loud spin, in case I had taken a wrong turn. They knew what they were doing, and I had no idea. I was a puppet but they pulled the strings only to save me from a fall. I had to to stay afloat with a peck of resources to aid me. One let me meet him everyday as long as he was physically around, but I stood for hours in front of Wing 3. With another, I called up and got one meeting in 1 and sometimes 2 months. That's how 3rd year treated me. They made me do it all! & when I met them with an output file....they critiqued, and critiqued so hard, I had to work more!

Today, when things are looking up, when I get the credits, they sit by me and smile! They still give me the push when I need one, when I am reluctant to go up and talk to that big guy! & then when that guy tells me that I've done a good job, I realize what I was doing all these years. They made me toil, so that one day I could grow up!

I always fantasized that my PhD guide would be someone who'd be like a third parent. Well I got more than that.....I got a bunch of new mentors who just don't say it out loud that they care....but who walks into the LAN looking for me when he has a new idea to polish my problem, or who is fumbling around looking for the best place for me in my next step ahead!

Awwww.......I love you all :)
Thanks a lot for all that you've been to me! I feel so proud to just be a part of your BIG world. Thanks a lot!